long.

i haven't written in a looooong time. Things are different.
I'm living in Leeds now, and i'm at uni. My course is average, pretty easy so i can't complain. The people im around are sweet and i'm loving being in a city. There's decent places to go out too which is a big bonus, makes a change from home.

The best thing i have ever read.

"You can't save anyone from themselves. You will lose everything by attempting to play saviour.
You will never heal the wounded. You cannot repair the damage already done by selfish parents, vicious ex-lovers, child molesters, tyrants, poverty, depression or simple chemical imbalance.
You can't undo psychic wounds, bandage old scars, kiss away ancient bruises.
You can't make the pain go away. You can't shout down the voices in other people's heads. You can't make anyone feel special. They will never feel beautiful enough, no matter how beautiful they are to you. They will never feel loved enough, no matter how much you adore them.
You will never be able to save the battered from battling back at a world they've grown up to hate. They will always find a way to pick up where the bullies have left off. They will in turn become bullies. They will turn you into the enemy. They will always find a new method in which to punish themselves. Thereby punishing you.
No matter how much you've convinced yourself that you have done absoloutly everything in your power to prove your undying devotion, unfaltering commitment and unending encouragement, you will never be able to save a miserable basterd from themselves.
The wounded will always find a way to spread their pain over a vast terrain, like an emotional tsunami which devastates the surrounding landscape. An ever-expanding firewall which will singe everything and everyone in its wake. The long you love a damaged person the more it will hurt you."

Credit to Lydia Lunch, Barcelona, 2007.

see you

i got back from reading on monday, it was pretty good. Full of little dicks as usual, two girls that stick to mind were walking around shouting the lyrics to casanova by Gallows, made me want to cut of my ears to rid myself of the torture. Other than the countless amount of idiots it was decent. Deftones were amazing, as were friendly fires. KOL were extremely dissapointing which pissed me off, they played too much shit off the new album. Arctics were shite aswell. I did some awful MD which made me want to rip my stomach out of my body, i managed to spend very little, and it was pretty cold.
It was my birthday on the sunday, finally turned 18. I only saw brand new and gallows, both were pretty decent. I spent my evening in the silent disco where i swear they played the same 10 songs twice in the same order.

I move to leeds in just over a week, im pretty stoked for that. Looking forward to getting away from this shitty town. Im going London tomorrow to buy myself stuff with the little money that i have. I want to go to offset festival this weekend but noone will go with me, suckers.

birthday wishes.

money, americal apparel vouchers, fish eye lens for canon 400d, arran knitted cardigan, train tickets, OC boxsets, nose piercing, cute dinner set, nice bed sheets, ray bans, money, urban outfitters vouchers, zing, short fur jacket, hair/nails/skin tablets, owl tatoo, heels, mac vouchers, disposables, ticket for i love techo 09, christmas holiday, anything for uni.

life for now.

summer

zante/benicassim/reading/birthday.

the eternal fight

oh, and the new horrors album is actually good.

.....

i should have revised today but i played guitar hero instead. im going to fail my exams and not get into uni. I NEED A JOB.

G.Barr

Today was windy, and G.Barr took some pictures of me.

nietzsche.

h8rid.

there are no lemon lemsips left, and i don't like the blackcurrant ones.

20/02/09

last night i went to 'The Custard Factory' in Birmingham to see Cluekid, Caspa and Benga.
amazing.

petit garcon

i have a new hair cut.

i did look like this

and now, i look like this;

ashes ashes ashes.

i have just finished reading 'Narcisa' By johnathan shaw.

addiction, relationships, drugs, sex, demands, obsession, hate, love, passion, fucking, escaping, realism, belief, regret, need, want, desire.

fucking sweet.

"Baby, people like us, we're so fucking rotten inside, even Jesus can't save our ass, and the devil don't want us anymore either. That's why we're stuck with each other."

narcisa: our lady of ashes
heartworm press

live from planet death.

Describe your personal style: very cheap and not so cheerful.

What are the staples in your wardrobe? leggings, vests, too many black dresses, brogue boots, band tshirts, heels, checkered hoody shirt thing.

What's your signature look? daytime; black flag t, black leggings, brogue boots, fur jacket or my mac. i tend to wear this wherever i go, unless im feeling particularly daring. nighttime; black dress, black leggings/tights, black heels.

What inspires you? thinking, and my friends

Who is your fashion muse? i dont have one inparticular, i tend to wear the same thing or same style of thing all the time and i dont know where i got it from. i just enjoy looking at certain people.

Favorite purchase of all time? this is hard. maybe my brogue boots, or my cream fur.

Biggest splurge? my biggest splurge is probably bvlgari diamond earrings but that was a few years ago, and i only wear them on special occasions. i tend to get alot of things for free, cast offs from others. and i spend very little on my clothes.

Beauty routine? cleanse, moisturise. mac liquid foundation, mac concealer, mac compressed powder, mascara, blusher. if im going out at night, maybe some mac lippy, depends how i'm feeling, and maybe some liquid eyeliner.

What jewelry do you never take off? my swatch, two festival bands though im not sure they count as jewelry, and a pink plastic ring which my friend gave me years ago from a christmas cracker.

What are you wishing for? money, a nice gold necklace, some MD, cigarettes, some ridiculousley tight stonewash jeans, boat shoes, for someone to pay to get my film developed, to book a holiday, to find this little park in london i want to visit, and i want to like my hair short as im worried i won't like it.

What are your obsessions? obsessing.

valentines

My valentines day consisted of stayin in bed all day, and drinking by myself.

It was poor on the standard of a normal day. On standards of valentines day, it was literally awful.

ahhhh oui!

i've just returned from Paris, well 'just' in a loose sense of the word as i got back on Sunday and it's now Tuesday. Anyway, it was a sweet trip, or should i say c'etait bon. It's shit being back in old angleterre, allthough i have just had an extra two days off of school due to the snow so i shouldn't complain. One of the highlights of the trip was that i picked up a litre of sangria in a carton for 1euro55cent, BARGAIN. And it brightened up the long journey home, tres bien!